blog 2010
eccentric observations, cracked opinions, and nonstandard commentary
sunday, november 21, 2010
pope allows condom use
i liked the fifteenth-century popes better ...
they stuck to what they knew best ...
like potions, angels, and curses ...
tuesday, november 16, 2010
political cliches that need to be retired
aid & abet; aid & comfort; checks & balances; clear & present; cut & run; free & fair; hearts & minds; law & order; waste, fraud & abuse ...
talk to me; tell me in concrete terms what you mean ...
sunday, october 24, 2010
another headline for the onion
conservative religious scholars combing through jesus's words ...
for any hint of a marxist influence ...
friday, october 22, 2010
speaking truth to power
will someone please retire this cliche?
power doesn't care what you think or say ...
that's what it means to have power ...
never having to care what people think ...
tuesday, october 5, 2010
multi-alarm fire
sirens are like wolves ...
when one starts howling, they all do ...
thursday, september 30, 2010
indigenous peoples month?
how about an indigenous peoples century ...
wednesday, september 29, 2010
new section in the newspaper
the sports crime page ...
monday, september 20, 2010
proposed book title
'the migratory habits of human beings'
monday, september 20, 2010
headline for the onion
or the nytimes, i can't decide which ...
'suspected drone allegedly kills presumed human beings'
tuesday, september 14, 2010
tom swiftie
'i don't feel too good today'
he said (sic) ...
thursday, august 26, 2010
tani cantil-sakauye
first minority chief justice, by race ...
and first majority chief justice, by gender ...
thursday, july 22, 2010
headline for the onion
president chavez breaks off diplomatic ties with venezuela ...
saturday, july 10, 2010
bozo eruption?
if a woman accusing a man of sexual impropriety is called a 'bimbo eruption' ...
then a male accuser should be a 'bozo eruption' ...
sunday, may 2, 2010
headline that didn't make the onion
editorial: disasters need tv just as much as tv needs disasters ...
tuesday, april 20, 2010
practice makes perfect
we're always being told that the more you do something ...
the better you get at it ...
what about bad drivers ...
just doing more driving doesn't make them better ...
the same with bad teachers ...
sunday, april 18, 2010
headline that didn't make the onion
politician accused of politicizing the political process ...
thursday, april 15, 2010
the design of public places
the downtown berkeley bart station looks like it was designed by the same guys who did the experiments with rats in cages ...
monday, april 12, 2010
no regrets
don't you love it when someone says ...
'i have no regrets' ...
that's like saying, 'i've never learned anything in my whole life' ...
what about all those people you hurt ...
would you hurt them again?
saturday, april 10, 2010
law of conservation of k's
every time someone says 'axe a question' instead of 'ask a question' ...
or 'eck cetera' instead of 'et cetera' ...
someone else has to say 'assessible' instead of 'accessible' ...
wednesday, march 10, 2010
a building at ground zero that's 1776 feet tall
very patriotic, very moving ...
but it should stand even taller at 1789 feet ...
celebrating the constitution and the bill of rights ...
thursday, march 4, 2010
falling expectations
i used to be for peace ...
now i'm just for lengthening the interval between wars ...
tuesday, february 9, 2010
another headline for the onion
'statistical link found between loud music at 3 am and anger' ...
monday, january 4, 2010
headline that didn't make the onion
'senate republicans finally reach 41-seat majority' ...
monday, january 4, 2010
how come dolphins are people
but people are never dolphins?